One who used to be in an Italian congregation told me about a sister who's husband was very cruel to her. He was being groomed to be an elder. So the other elders protected him.
The sister turned to the elders for support but they gaslighted her - effectively telling her she was imagining it all, she was not perceiving things correctly.
She was not allowed to talk about it. But the one from Italy told me that her eyes kept looking at him pleading, yearing and in earnest as if saying 'these people are mad.'
He did not know how to help her. He was still new to it all, and did not stay for very long. But he recognized that look. He knew something was seriously wrong.
To this day the memory of her eyes remain with him. She killed herself.